Dictionary definition: A’nal’o’gy (noun) 1. Comparison between two things that are similar in some way, often used to help explain something or make it easier to understand.
Sometimes bad analogies make us laugh, or perhaps cringe. Here are twelve really bad analogies originally attributed to school children.
- Her vocabulary was as bad as, like, whatever.
- She had a deep, throaty, genuine laugh, like that sound a dog makes just before it throws up.
- The little boat gently drifted across the pond exactly the way a bowling ball wouldn’t.
- He was as tall as a six-foot, three-inch tree.
- Her hair glistened in the rain like a nose hair after a sneeze.
- The plan was simple, like my brother-in-law Phil. But unlike Phil, this plan just might work.
- He was deeply in love. When she spoke, he thought he heard bells, as if she were a garbage truck backing up.
- She grew on him like she was a colony of E. Coli, and he was room-temperature Canadian beef.
- The young fighter had a hungry look, the kind you get from not eating for a while.
- The ballerina rose gracefully en Pointe and extended one slender leg behind her, like a dog at a fire hydrant.
- From the attic came an unearthly howl. The whole scene had an eerie, surreal quality, like when you’re on vacation in another city and Jeopardy comes on at 7:00 p.m. instead of 7:30.
- Her face was a perfect oval, like a circle that had its two sides gently compressed by a Thigh Master.
Some of those were as beyond belief as you wouldn’t believe.
Ha, ha! Good one, David.
I had such a good laugh at this today, I had to share it. Thanks for posting it, Jack.
Good! Laughter is the best medicine. 🙂 Share away!
Reblogged this on Jean Reinhardt and commented:
I started laughing at number one and didn’t stop till the last one, which is probably my favourite (a gentle Thigh Master?) lol.
So funny. Wouldn’t it be fun to create a character who was that bad at analogies?
Yes! That would be both fun and a challenge. Good idea.
Unfortunately, my mind goes blank with this stuff. Someone else will have to run with it:)
Understand, D. Wallace Peach. My mind, too, goes blank like the blank blackboard before the chalk arrives. 🙂
These are hilarious, Jack. They do sound like the sort of things some school children would write just for the fun of it! I don’t know which one I like the best.Thank you for sharing them. 😀
Welcome, milliethom! Hard for me to decide which I like better, too.
Let’s just like them all. They’re great fun.
Heh, heh, heh. Some of the best.
I really like how analogies speak to people through writing. Thank you for liking many of my blog posts! 🙂
You’re welcome, Jennifer. I enjoy your blog. Thank you for posting!
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Hilarious, Jack. You made my day. 😀
Thank you, Suzanne!